The power of positive thinking

Yes, its a cliche'd statement however, I felt the need to write something about this after the experience I have had over the past few months with someone very special in my life.

A few years ago, my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer, it was a a very traumatic revelation not only for her but also for the rest of the family. Those initial few days from diagnosis to action seemed surreal - I was in my early 20's and couldn't quite fathom or grasp what was happening. I saw my mum morphing from the happy go lucky person into a very lost and depressed person. Having limited access to the www we really had no clue what all this meant, we followed the motions laid out for us by the doctors and the radiologists and that was that. In my country there is nothing called counselling for these sorts of things, the patient so to speak is left to basically deal with it as best they can.

It took her years to heal emotionally as well as physically.

After 13 years, last october we had the angel of doom give us the news that there was a tumour recurrence, this time, thankfully we had the www to counter check everything to make sure we knew what was going on every step of the way and naturally we were all older and wiser and readier if thats what you call it, to deal with the next steps and do what we had to do. Its taken 9 months with chemo and radiation to get to a point where the doctor finally says we are over the worst and the cancer has been cleared.... thank God.

This time around though there was one major difference from years ago and that was MUM. I was amazed to see just how strong she was emotionally. At times when the stress of everything was overwhelming, and well meaning family and friends actually questioned me or my brother if we were doing the right thing, she stood un-waivered, assuring us both that we were doing the right thing (my reaction was just to retort and say 'yeah i'm gonna do something that's gonna kill her off') I cant imagine going through most of what she had too in the past few months, at many points in the process I could feel myself giving up almost, but not MUM she stood firm in her belief that she was going to be ok. She kept that smile on her face and stood up strongly against every thing that came in front of her. The perils of Chemotherapy, the reaction to the chemo overdose and the daily radiation that took its toll nothing could wipe that smile off her face.

Kudos to you MA, you are a testament to your faith, and a strength to us all - I am more in awe of you today than I have been of anyone in my life, you have shown me that all you need to have in your life is the faith to get you through each day. May you grow stronger in your belief and be a strength to every cancer patient who needs to win the battle over this wretched disease.

We love you.

A woman's crowning virtue

Today as i sat on the side lines of a busy Oncology ward waiting to see my mums Oncologist for a final diagnosis of her reports, i looked around and saw the many strained faces of fellow patients and their families - some entering the ward for the first time, some recovering from treatments, some waiting like me to hear the dreaded reality and some looking lost and confused.

Amongst all the hustle and bustle a thought crossed my mind.... for most of us women, how we look is so important. We always want to project the right image and one of the things we take great pains in is our hair. We cut, we blow dry, we straighten, perm, colour or relax, whatever it takes to get the salon look to make us feel on top of the world. But sitting here i look around and see the many women who have had to fall victim to the harsh reality of chemo therapy which makes all your hair fall out.

I remember a few months ago after my mum started treatment, the painful process of her hair fall. No amount of preparation or counselling made her ready for what she went through in those agonising few days. The itching, the redness, the hair falling in clumps around her, the pieces of hair flying off in the wind, the patchy baldness - it was more than I could bear watching from the sidelines. I cant imagine what she felt having to live through it.

I smile with one of the women who has travelled many miles to come for her treatment and I think to myself how truly brave these people are, how much pain are they enduring just like my mum, to find a cure for this dreaded disease. In that split second I realise how superficial we can be and how in a moment everything can just turn upside down and it could be any one of us walking through that ward as a patient someday.

I look around and see the bald heads the wigs and it hits me, a woman's crowning virtue.... lost in the process of cure.